Scavanged by DeLiRiOuS
Buried discreetly beneath the depths of an abandoned Motel 6, a place already swarming with other diseases of rotten nefarious descriptions. Near the vicinity of old Washington D.C. is the place where your possible salvation along with the salvation of the rest of the world may lie. In this place are men dedicated to the extraction of the most important of digital collections, your porn.
Now that the market is flooded with nothing but zombie on zombie, and interhuman zombie movies these men hold the very key to getting back your most precious of precious after your hard drives have been zapped out of commission while running from the unholy dead. And god forbid lying there next to your porn collection on a hard drive more dead than your asshole neighbor Bob.. (fucking Bob!).. is the formula for the cure.. thats right.. the cure for the disease! After years of research and painstaking trial and error you’ve found it! Just to have it all taken away by the walking corpse of that fucking goober Bob! Who you came home to find one day endlessly googling the term “brains”, “asian brains” , and “two girls one cup.” Who knew Zombies were still computer savvy in their afterlife? Regardless of that surprising discovery a scuffle ensued, a mess was made, and now your stuck with the shattered remnants of a cheaply made, Chinese assembled laptop computer! The one with all your unfinished poems, grade A porn and most importantly the cure…. And despite all previous warnings and despite the fact that it held the most important cure in possibly all of man kind’s history; you didn’t make a friggin’ backup!
Well fear not my friend because as long as you can manage to get your drive to the hard working boys at www.getbackmyporn.com you’ll get that cure back…or at the very least you’ll have back your entertainment for those lonely Saturday nights in the zombie bunker.
Scavanged by Baehr Manley
It doesn’t matter if you’ve got to find out if zombies are lurking inside that abandoned Circle K (as Bill and Ted have taught us…there are strange things afoot at the Circle K), or that shady looking cave/mineshaft you found boarded up, you need to safely put eyes in there to see if it’s safe to enter and start your inspection. Nothing complex like a loud clunky RC truck with a camcorder taped to it, just something simple like the See Snake by Rigid. This handy little snake cam gives you the ability to see into tight spaces or under the doorway into the room from the safety of the other side. It’s got adjustable LEDs and a mirror attachment to pipe the feed directly to the handheld 2.5″ LCD color screen. With a 10 foot reach you no longer have to worry about “touching that with a 10 foot pole”, since you can take a peek first.
Scavanged by Baehr Manley
Scouting ahead isn’t always a smart thing to do in areas with clusters of shambling undead. It’s dangerous, takes a lot of manpower, and is mentally draining on your group. You need some eyes in the sky in the hard-to-scout urban ruins. Why not slap a camera on the X6 Draganflyer 6 rotor UAV and put some eyes high up where you can actually see that crowd of zombies waiting in line for the midnight release of your brains. The x6 is expendable, reliable and easy to fly. You can mount any type of surveillance equipment to suit your needs, whether its a still camera, a high resolution camcorder, night vision or thermal imaging (not that zombies put out much heat), giving you some serious versatility that would take a lot more manpower and coordination on the ground. I think the biggest plus for me is the anti-vibration camera mount, so I don’t have to worry about getting sick like we’re recording the sequel to the Blair Witch, or Cloverfield. Just one more thing to be thankful for.
Scavanged by Baehr Manley
If you’re out in the field collecting data on the area, (you know, things like zombie density, possible supply areas and other dangers) having a solid reliable laptop to cross check data and take some detailed notes you should make sure it’s something that won’t crap out the first time it takes a bump during a scuffle with some zeds. The Panasonic Toughbook 30 should suffice quite nicely.
The 160GB shock mounted drive will make sure you don’t lose your precious data and if by some crazy stroke of luck there’s some kind of usable network, this thing is ready to access it, allowing you to send and receive data in the harshest of environments (thanks to IP65 certified sealed all-weather design). With the crazy things this monster has survived, it’s nice to know that a little splattered gray matter and gore won’t stop the Toughbook from getting the job done.
Scavanged by Baehr Manley
Nobody likes stalking about alone while you’re moving through any unsecure areas. The buddy system will keep you alive and bite free, but for those times when you need to split up, the Motorola Talkabout lets you stay in touch with your travel buddy. With 22 channels, and a range of approximately 28 miles, the Talkabout is very reliable and you don’t have to worry about finding a 3G tower for a cell signal when you need to call for backup. Even if your loud bright pants don’t blend with the wilds around you, at least you can rest easy knowing your two-way radio will.
Scavanged by Hudson Steele
When it comes to handheld GPS devices, the Lowrance Endura Sierra is just about as good as it gets. It comes with a barometric altimeter, tri-axial compass, 4 GB of internal memory and a high resolution 2.7″ touch screen. It comes fully loaded with topographic outdoor maps, meaning you’re not limited to the roads like in your car GPS. The Hot Key buttons are a nice feature too, allowing you access main features quickly. As a nice bonus, it features a micro SD expansion slot supporting up to an additional 32GB of storage for pictures and MP3 audio files. There’s no infestation Hot Spots in their customizable map content yet, but hopefully some of their users will be up to the task when the time comes along.
Scavanged by Hudson Steele
Both finding working batteries and finding a safe place to get some exercise could render themselves difficult after Z-Day. A lot of your survival gear may depend on getting some power, and if you’re holed up for long periods of time, the last thing you need is to cramp up when it’s time to flee.
We recommend the Pedal-A-Watt Stationary Bicycle Generator to kill 2 birds with one stone. Just slip your own bicycle’s rear wheel into this contraption and pedal away for clean, renewable energy powerful enough to run a small TV or laptop. In addition, batteries are available if you need to store up some juice for later.
Scavanged by Nakita Ferrari
If you happen to be in a high rise or even just an apartment complex when the Zs come, and your in the process of building your escape vehicle, how do you gather supplies? Well break in to your neighbors places of course! The sound of busting open a locked door is going to draw some unwanted Zacks your way and not all of us are lock picking pros. Thats why you need the EZ Snap Lock Pick Gun at your disposal. Even en route to a safety zone your gonna need a way to break into places for food, gas, and shelter, no matter how prepared you think you are. This light, compact, stainless steel gun is a great addition to your Zsurvival kit. Rather than opening locks by the traditional raking techniques as with standard lock-picks a snap gun uses a primary law of physics, the transfer of energy, to compromise locks.
Scavanged by Baehr Manley
Say you find yourself in charge of clearing a room with no lights (night time, no power, etc), and you left your night vision goggles back at the camp. Lucky for you, you’re carrying the Surefire E2D Defender® Flashlight. This compact, rugged flashlight generates six times the output of a typical 2 D-cell flashlight (120 lumens at it’s highest setting), and features a crenellated Strike Bezel® and scalloped tailcap, providing two sets of hard-anodized aluminum “teeth” as a last resort self defense weapon. Sure it’s not going to punch a hole in any Z-heads, but it gives you a nice solid striking surface to hopefully create an escape route. The E2D compliments the Glock 21 nicely, allowing you to utilize a wide variety of “hands together” (like the ‘Harries’ or ‘Chapman’) or “hands apart” (like the ‘FBI’ or ‘Neck-Index’) techniques while searching for any undesirable party guests in dark corners.
Scavanged by Hudson Steele
Having a good set of Binoculars is like having an extra set of eyes. If you go into a new area for food and provisions blind, you’re more likely to end up being a meal for the Zed-Heads rather than finding anything for yourself. They’re also useful to keep an eye out for any encroaching flesh eaters when you’re out in the open, on the move or resting.
The 7×50 Commander III Military by Seiner are rugged, multi-purpose, and great in both day and night applications. The brilliant optics give the Commander II the highest light gathering ability of any compass binocular without the aid of electronics. It also features a combined HD compass so you don’t get all turned around when you’re scoping out the next city for supplies. No worries breaking them either, they’re built to military spec standards for shock resistance, humidity and water proofing.
